War!

Rick at Right Wing Nuthouse has some misapprehensions about female warriors:

“Who guards the louvetrain? The direct approach to Politburo?

Avtari blanched when he glanced down at the map. “Attila.� he whispered.

Superhawk pondered that bit of news for a moment. The former barbarian queen and her horde of Amazonian warriors were a formidable opponent. But ever since her marriage to the son of King Rusty of Jawa Land the Amazonians had forsworn war and taken up farming. Superhawk also remembered Attila’s tender caresses, the warmth of her kisses, the softeness of her…

The Barbarian King sighed. It woudn’t have worked. Both of them wanted to lead. Neither could yeild. Their parting was for the best. Perhaps he could buy her off with chocolates? It had worked in the past. Or some shiny trinket? That’s it!

“Avtari, send a rider and have him fetch the Jewel of Mathwrate. Instruct him to present it to Queen Attila with my compliments and these words; ‘You are my one. I am yours. When next Siddira opens her arms, I will be with you again.�

“But M’Lord, the moon will be full in less than a fortnight. How can…� Superhawk cut him off.

“Leave that to me. Unless I am mistaken, the Queen will take our bribe and slip quietly away. And without her, the Amazonians will not fight.�

Ah, but long-ago peacetime pleasures are lost in the crush of war, and my husband won't let me accept trinkets these days, unless they're from him. So the Amazonians fight. Which is bad news for the wingnuts, since most of my Amazonians are about twice my own height, and they all carry M16 A-2s.

And the Commissar admits that we might have a problem on our hands.

But remember, Kids: sometimes war is the answer.