You don't already pay for internet access at home?

You pay for internet access?
And WATER!?!?!???

What will we have to pay for next?
Taxes on our INCOME???

If you're really nice I might send you a few scraps of bandwidth I have sitting on my cable modem.

I wouldn't get bent, darling. I expect this whole electricity fad to blow over. I haven't given up my kerosene radio. And I'm not alone. Eddy Van Halen still keeps his original, steam guitar well oiled. When they pass word that your octuple core celerons are obsolete, I'll be laughing last and best. Yes I will. Any day now. Yup.

Well, okay. We do pay for our DSL access at home. But that's a utility, like phone service, natural gas, electricity and cable TV.

Weekly Sopranos episodes are more vital than phone service. If someone really wants to contact you there's always snail mail.

Oh for cripes sake girl!

I would love to have have high speed internet service. I have to live with dial-up. I can't get DSL or even cable! The local TV stations say that by their calculations I get a good enough signal so I can't get them on my satellite dish. I haven't watched CBS or ABC for YEARS because of the poor signal (which really doesn't bother me). I live two miles out of town! There are people 5-10-15 miles out of town that can get DSL and cable. But because I live on a short road with few houses nobody will run any services in.

My phone service also s*cks. When it rains I'm lucky to get 28k. The phone company knows the lines are bad, but they are too busy installing DSL lines to the rest of the valley.

Thanks for letting me vent. This just irritates me to no end.

Now what were you saying about bottled water? I used to be in the water buisness. 8^)

Very funny post!

Cheers :-)

Mpro

I was probably the last in my crowd to switch over to dialup, probably because I knew it would seal my fate as an addict. Now, of course, it's like oxygen.

The only other person I know without high-speed lives in Topanga Canyon, just on the other side of Malibu. Guess there aren't enough techies among her hippie neighbors to make it worthwhile.

I'd work on the phone company and see if you can get DSL; it might be easier than cable. Write lots of letters. If that doesn't work, call people up and swear at them.

No cable where I live, and I hope the population density never rises to the point where it's viable for cable to be run. No TV reception either, and I don't watch enough to make buying satellite worthwhile. And DSL? Forget it.

Good news is that two years ago a deli opened up two miles up the shore that has free WiFi. Free WiFi in Union, Washington is like, oh, antigravity in LA.

Not so good news is that I spend most of my time (like, ten or eleven months a year) overseas, aboard a ship which has a lousy 36 kbps bandwidth satellite link, which is shared by every PC aboard plus the voice phone signal. So when home, dialup seems pretty good. Free WiFi and a sandwich or pizza seems like heaven.

Even though I have to pay for the sandwich or pizza.

I'm considering a laptop and eating in town a lot. Many of the restaurants have wi-fi. Then I could drop the phone company completely and tell them to sit on it and spin.

Just don't know, I'm trying to lose weight now. How will having lunch in town every day affect my weight, badly I would say.

One thing I know is that I wouldn't move. Great view, no neighbors to speak of, close to town yet still out of town. AND PRIVACY GALORE.

The radio and T.V. are passing fancies that will soon pass that is true. I've read this post to all my friends, they agree you are have the wittiest blog ever.

Find a Panera Bread Co. Most have free wireless, their pastries are better, and the coffee refills are free.

Jack,

If you can find a place that serves a bitchin' chicken salad, go for it. For instance, a good Chinese Chicken salad with a dressing that isn't too sweet will lose you weight, even granted the almond slices are high-calorie (they are also very healthy in small quantities).

Or turkey sandwiches--that's another great option.